Monthly Archives: August 2011
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In what has been the most stuttering and frustrating start to any BeerandBoobs season the league finally burst into life this morning when the league website was updated with results to last week’s games, fixtures for all the gameweeks and a league table.
Of course the lack of fixtures beforehand meant managers were unaware of their opponents until the results were in and when they were posted this morning they have caused both jubilation and uproar.
There were wins for new boys Engineered Eleven, and Wii Unfit
which is quite clearly beginners luck as we all know new sides in the toughest
fantasy football league in the world rarely do well. Unfit must do battle with
the Greeks next week while the Engineers will take on last year’s double
winners Steaua Needarest, games don’t come much tougher than that so we fully
expect both these upstarts to be put back in their place by Monday night.
Torpedo Belgrano on the other hand made the kind of start we
expect of newcomers scoring just 17 points and with their manager sunning his
hide on a Turkish sun lounger this week we don’t expect anything but last place
to remain theirs for a little longer.
This will of course upset BareAssalona fans who consider
last place their territory and true to form their meagre points total ensure
yet another poor start to the season for them.
BEGD FC GOT OFF TO A WINNING START FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 3 YEARS!!
Remember this day everyone as when Edwards realises he is in the top
half of the table he will surely burst.
Not everyone was happy however with Dyslexic Untied and Real
SociableDad both scoring over 50 points a win was surely in the bag but the
league fixtures had other ideas, pitting them against teams which scored even
more. After sitting all week waiting for the fixtures to be published knowing
the odds on a defeat were slim both Brewder and Jenkins were looking forward to next week expecting the first 3 pts of the season to be assured. Instead both
managers have called for an immediate investigation to take place claiming that
Spiros Gall has infiltrated the fixture panel and offered incentives to fix the
first round to ensure victory for his side and defeats for not only his two
biggest enemies in the league but also his wife’s side The Ass Kickers.
Before anyone claims this is sour grapes one should remember
that Spiros has a very shady past and recently added to his criminal record by
getting caught red-handed in the Manchester Riots with armfuls of platform
shoes which he took before torching Wynsdors and growth hormones he grabbed through Holland and Barrett’s smashed window. Police issued this picture on their web site last week in which Gall can clearly be seen with his fellow gang members after they were apprehended.
Gall was released on bail pending his court appearance and
is free to take the reins of the Dwarfs for this weekend’s clash with Wii Unfit
but a custodial sentence is expected soon.
For full results and league standings click here.
BeerandBoobs v3.01 starts this weekend.
After all of the waiting and hype surrounding the start of the new season the first weekend of BeerandBoobs v3.0 was completely ruined when the Premier League web site crashed completely on Friday night rendering logging in impossible. Such was the severity of the problem that it did not re appear until Saturday afternoon by which time the deadline for the gameweek had passed and managers were left with unfinished squads.
Two schools of thought quickly emerged. One which vehemently took the stance that those affected shouldn’t have been so numb as to leave it so late to register for the league or sort their final squad out and they should suffer the consequences and be excluded for the season or be forced to use their wildcard in the first week of the season to sort their teams out.
The other took pity on those managers who, and it should be stressed, through no fault of their own, were unable to gain access to the site before the agreed deadline to make their changes.
In a rare move the normally omnipotent league administration offered the managers the chance to vote on what action to take, whether to carry on regardless and bugger those affected or to level the playing field for everyone and scrap week one, open the league to those not able to register and start the scoring from week 2.
After a frenzied debate on Twitter where emotions ran high a vote was taken which showed that (by 11 votes to 3) the majority wished to start again this week.
The site has confirmed that transfers will be unlimited once more until the deadline for week 2 to ensure those who did register on time the same opportunity to rejig their squads if they wish to do so.
So we are once again awaiting the start of the new season, now named BeerandBoobs v3.01 which kicks off this weekend.
Good Luck Everyone
Not content with upsetting new father Bubba Edwards after the birth of his son by calling him a girl, turned his vitriolic attention to non-other than his beloved wife Angela.
Those who took part last year will be aware that Angela manages the Ass Kickers and proved herself to be well worth of her place amongst the fantasy football elite, narrowly missing out on the playoffs as her first season came to an end. Her side was difficult to beat and always a threat to the favourites last year and she is expected to build on last season this term.
However, whilst speaking “off the record” as it were, Spiros let slip that in his opinion her side is “complete shit”. He went on saying “What is she thinking of? Robbie Keane for F** SAKE!!”
When reminded that the season has not yet started and many of the teams will contain “makeshift” players while managers juggle to find the best way of fitting in 15 players to a £100m budget, Spiros would not waiver from his opinion that Angela had lost the plot.
“She shouldn’t even be considered for a franchise in this league” he ranted, “I am proud that I take part in a league made up of the most brilliant and respected managers in the world, what on earth are the league administrators thinking of letting amateurs like her in”
“Don’t get me wrong I love her to bits, she makes a cracking Kleftico and lets me do things that the dog turns its nose up at but football management?? Do me a favour!”
“If I didn’t have the respect I have for this league I would be off like a shot to form my own breakaway league” he threatened, “I could do it you know, I know people, powerful people, people who would back me and my opinions to the hilt. I’d have my own cup competition and everything”
With just 4 days to go until the start of the season the vindictive Lilliputian seems intent on making himself the man everyone loves to hate and it would seem he doesn’t care who he hurts in order to draw attention to himself.
What do you think about Spiros and his outbursts? Have your say below.
The gameweeks which will shape your lives for the next nine months have been finalised.
Following our recent poll it was decided that, pending the expected 24 teams applying before the deadline, there will be 4 bonus rounds in which the team scoring the most points in that single gameweek will win a £10 prize. The prizes for the three traditional competitions will therefore remain unchanged (£50 for the Cup winners, £50 for the League winners and £100 for the Play Off winners)
Below is a table showing each gameweek and the competition attached to it:
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