Spiros returns triumphant from Borneo after visiting the the lost Pygmy tribe of the Djellibaybis.

With the lack of Premiership footy there is also, inevitably, a lack of fantasy related gossip to report and the last two weeks have been very slow newsweeks.

We were bouyed, however, when yesterday we learned news of our favourite midget manager Spiros Gall who returned to the UK after a triumphant tour of the country of his ancestors. Many of you will of course know of Spiros’ claims to have Greek lineage but nothing could be further from the truth. In fact his Greek forefathers are something Gall invented, a figment of his imagination, in order to create a more exotic persona for himself, primarily to attract girls in his younger days.

This little ruse did of course pay dividends when Angela, his trophy wife, seduced by the thought of free kebabs and home made baklava, fell for the charms of Spiros some years ago. For decades Spiros has cavorted around Rhodes paying the locals to pose as family members to impress upon his unsuspecting wife the idea that his family were in fact, shipping magnates form the Hellenic Republic. Now, even though happily married and Angela completely taken in by his carefully crafted web of deceit, Spiros decided the guilt of lying to his beloved was too much to bear and at last it was time to come clean and tell her the truth about his real family tree.

One can only imagine Angela’s face when confronted with the news that her daughters grandfather was a simple coconut farmer called Picker #33 Awang Koyoh bin Muhammad Shahin from the long lost Djellibaybi Pygmy tribe in Borneo. Well it turns out Angela quite likes a bit of coconut and so was well up for a trip to visit her new found family.

After Days of wearisome trudging through dense mosquito infected jungle the pair finally arrived in the tribal village of the Djellibaybi tribe where Spiros was shocked to learn that he is now a local hero to his tribe who are fiercely proud of their long lost son and who they have almost deifiedas the only pygmy from the tribe ever to have done anything other than pick coconuts and herd goats with his life.

Angela must have felt like Gulliver in Lilliput as Spiros was hoisted above the heads of the villagers (about waist height for Angela) and carried to the Chief’s hut whereupon he was festooned with gifts and garlands of flowers.

Spiros, in the native costume of the tribe, enjoys a relaxing afternoon in the pool.

Kev and Angela have since been living the life of king and queen as this rare photo of Spiros (wearing native dress) shows as he relaxes in the chief’s private swimming pool.

All too soon however their time was brought to an end as management duties meant that the couple had to return home. Kev, with his wife fully aware of the reasons behind his shortness of stature, was said to be feeling on top of the world and ready for the rest of the season.

As and when we have further news from the Jungle we will of course spice it up and bring it to you.

This weekend see’s the resumption of BeerandBoobs Fantasy League after the two week break for pointless International Friendlies.

Good Luck to All.

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Posted on November 15, 2011, in General News. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Obviously Brewder has to much time on his hands and an overactive imigination. We all know that John is not one to let the truth get in the way of a good story (or in this case a crock of shite). For anyone who does not follow myself and Angela on Twitter we have actually been to Cape Verde for two weeks of sun and basically doing bugger all. I know John will not be interested in facts but here are a coup three anyway:

    1) Cape Verde is in Africa and Borneo is Indonesia

    2) The distance between Cape Verde and Borneo is 9350.3 miles

    3) Cape Verde has an average of 9.8 inches of rainfall a year against Borneo’s average of 165 inches

    These facts may not be amusing as Brewders fantasy ramblings but they are facts and I thought it may be quite refreshing (if a bit boring) for a few truths to be posted on the Bullshit Blog

    As John accurately (for once) pointed out no Premier Games took place last weekend and this gave him the chance to ignore the fact that his team of has-beens and no-hopers are the only one of the big five (or four and a half as he likes to call it) who currently lie outside the top eight, I’m sure if Untied had won the previous week and maintained a play off place the blog would have featured a review of that weeks games, luckiily Untied lost and we were spared Brewder blowing his own tumpet.

    Anyway as JB says the game is back on this week so good luck to one and all, including Untied but as always excluding Gally City

  2. Why write “War and Peace” when you can just reply with a simple “Get fucked”.

    I’ve heard of loving the sound of your own voice, but loving your own words is a new one on me.

  3. Is it any wonder I elaborate a bit if the most interesting thing that happened this week is that you compared the rainfall of Cape Verde with that of Borneo?

  4. I thought the most interesting thing that has happened this week is that workshy skiver Cooper has man flu again and I never said the rainfal comparison was interesting, it’s just a fact

  5. 9.8 inches of rain? It must’ve been up to your knees Kev

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